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It Was a Very Good Day [43003]

By July 11, 2023Articles

Below is a poem that Dad asked me to read at his funeral. Dad said it summed up perfectly his philosophy of life. I hope you enjoy it…and let’s keep laughing because that’s what Gene would want.


It Was a Very Good Day

Between my rising hour of 8 AM

And my retiring hour of midnight,

I was a model of exemplary behavior.

I ate the proper amount of fruit

And vegetables and protein

And chewed each bite thirty-two times.

I made sure to limit my fat and my starch,

My cholesterol and my carbohydrates,

My salt and my sugar,

Forsaking the white bread

For healthy whole wheat.

I walked and jogged and lifted,

And exercised my lungs.

I did not partake of alcohol,

Or any drugs, legal or illegal.

I inhaled no tobacco smoke,

Neither first nor second hand.

I walked to work.

And en route I gave,

Out of the goodness of my heart,

Contributions of various sizes

To various homeless persons.

At the office, I did an honest day’s work

For an honest day’s pay.

At night, I scorned the mundane

And watched a National Geographic Special

On Public Broadcasting

As I ate low calorie popcorn,

Plain, without butter.

I flossed, brushed my teeth,

Got into bed,

And proudly contemplated my exemplary behavior.

And then it hit me.

The entire day had been rendered meaningless

By one simple omission

Not once, not for one solitary moment,

In the course of the flawless day,

Did I pause and take a moment to laugh.

            — Written by Ed Simmons